Style Invitational Week

Everyone's a Critic


... in which you were asked to write a food review for The Washington Post in the style of a famous author. There were six topics: a Quarter Pounder With Cheese, SweeTARTS, vanilla ice cream, escargots, poached salmon in tarragon butter and vacuum-sealed smorked beef rectum.

And the winner of the smorked beef rectum:

Cole Porter:

If your gal is curvy
And the mood is all hors
And you're nervy for the
prelude's to-and-fro
You could deftly unshell her
With some Oysters Rockefeller
But slip her the es-car-gots.
Strapless stunners in Manhattan
All appreciate a pat in
Just the right place,
The Rainbow Room, they say!
When the first wine is uncorked
There is something they want forked.
Slip her escargots,
The fore before the play!
With some garlic and some butter
You will find that creeper utterly
delicious when on lips you let it glow!
It's the quo before the quid
And the way to grease the id
When you slip her the

See the entire contest*
(until moves the link--AGAIN)

*Denotes external link. What--do we have to draw you a picture?